Photo: © Depositphotos.com/Elnur_
Written by Marcelo Illarmo and Greg Reimann

Abremalin Faust is the world’s foremost occult business consultant. He has been featured on the National Public Radio podcast Planet Money, in the Wall Street Journal, and Fangoria Magazine.

Available Workshops:

1. Be the Dark Lord Conjurer! Leverage Dark Magic Soft Skills to Get the Most Out of Your Employees

Many managers take an authoritarian “do this or be cast into hell” approach with their underlings—not necessarily because they want to be controlling, but because they believe exercising authority is the most efficient way to get results. What kind of manager are you? Infernal Worshipper? Alchemical Warlock? Pentacle Necromancer? Typhonian Wiccan? Learn how to understand your own style, and how to leverage the styles of others to more completely subjugate them to the will of the Evil One.

2. The Nature of Institutional Voids in Emerging Markets: Why Expansions Fail and How to Make Them Work

Conventional wisdom holds that the best way to select an emerging market to exploit is to evaluate its size and growth potential. The primary exploitable characteristic of an emerging market is actually the lack of institutions. Malaketh the Accursed, the ruler of the Dark Elves of Svarthalfheim, attempted to acquire of the Casket of Winters in his attempt to eliminate the local craft beer competition in neighboring Entelsworth. This seminar walks through the mistakes Malaketh made in the emerging market and identifies the best strategies to vacate the indigenous populations’ faith, hope, and goodwill. Subsequent classes will cover filling the ensuing emotional void with your product.

3. QuickBooks for Small Business Owners

4. Piercing Your Magic Bubble – Embracing Diversity / Respectful Workplace Communications

This seminar will discuss why managing and leveraging diversity is essential for organizational growth and success, as well as a healthy work environment. Participants will explore how diversity strengthens the workplace, and examine the recent case of Cthulhu’s Chaos Committee (CCC). Participants will also learn practical skills and strategies to improve their ability to work effectively with people of different social and cultural identities, such as orcs, amaroths, and wraiths. Remember: Our differences are our strength, our strength is our magic, and our magic is what will bring back Aaarrgalllalheth.

 

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Greg Reimann and Marcelo Illarmo are the Two Blue Monkeys.  They write together sometimes.