Photo: © Depositphotos.com/Khakimullin
Written by Joe Moore
Joe received the art above as part of Volume Ten, “The Challenge Edition,” in which contributors selected art for each other. He used it as the basis of his work.
Shari P.
Ok so I have had calamari in almost every restaurant in the state of NJ and I can say there are very few that even come close to what they serve here. My friend says the chef is a witch and she turns bad waitresses into squids and thats why. If thats true: more power to them. Never had a problem with the staff and again the “calamad” is Nonna-level amazeballs. One star off for parking, which can be tough with the Barnes and Noble and the Destination Maternity sharing the lot.
Mary L.
Good Salad, Cheap Specials, Chef is a Witch. What more can u ask for? Fun place to hang with the girls or the fam.
Tyler E.
So to start off, I’m a Wiccan and therefore a little biased. I heard about the witch of the Carrabba’s off Rt 42 in New Jersey on my friends AngelFire page (yes they are still around! 😛 ) that mostly follows Wiccan news. I will admit that I was skeptical, which is NOT typical for a Wiccan, as we generally believe any sort of crap that anyone says (Marilyn Manson was on the Wonder Years, Stanley Kubrick went to the Moon, Pokemon is the CIA, Marilyn Manson removed his ribs to suck his own dick on the Wonder Years, etc…).
That said, I had to find out for myself, being a believer in witchcraft and lover of all things chain-Italian food. So believe me when I say: this is the real deal. Chef Angela is definitely communicating with otherworldly powers. Her dedication to craft isn’t as spiritual as I’d prefer. She seems a little campy, what with the broom riding, the rhyming curses and the black hat. But the mozzarella we had was both firm yet moist in a way that no earthly powers could create.
I wouldn’t come back here because its very far from Boston but I would recommend it to anyone who questions whether or not witches exist or anyone who appreciates a really good penne.
Barbara R.
CHEF IS A WITCH. UNHOLY. I WILL PRAY FOR THIS PLACE. USED TO BE GOOD. SORRY WON’T SUPPORT SATAN. OLIVE GARDEN IS BETTER. WWJD?
Dennis L.
Was very excited to visit Carrabbas store number 0172, the 65th Carrabbas in the continental united states. My wife and I have been trying to travel to every single one in the country in our retirement, as you probably know from my 64 other reviews. Compared to the other Carrabba’s I’d say the ambiance is on par, the decor is identical, the bathrooms are clean, and the menu is very comparable. However, it’s more than lights and floor tiles that make a restaurant as you will know if you’ve read my 34 other reviews. The food also was very good. You can’t go wrong with a Carrabba’s, if you ask me. When we asked to speak with the che, Angela to congratulate her on her culinary triumph, she turned my wife into a frog. That was alarming. She must have sensed my frustration and turned her back into my wife immediately, which made it charming. Probably one of my favorite of all the Carrabba’s up there the one in Columbus Ohio when the power went out and they comped us, the one in Virginia where they comped us because a bird flew into the restaurant or the one in Ft Lauderdale where the chef is a werewolf.
Darren F.
mmy battery just died in frnt of the Destination Maternity n I had togo in and ask for a jump and the door was opem so I just walkedin and noone was there so I crept into the kitchen and there I seen some broad castin spells she had lightening glowing from her eyes she was cackling she made these tomato get up and dance like crazy I can’t describe it any other way and all the lights were flickering and when she was done there was a risotto that looked amazing and I don’t think she saw me but I ran like hell. Not really a review sorry but get the risotto.
Randy O.
I worked here for one shift and the chef is insane. She talks to the food while she cooks it, but not like cute stuff, like weird stuff like “bubble bubble boil trouble” stuff. Super hacky and weird. That said, food is excellent. for starters I guess the witch does have magic powers, but secondly its a carrabbas so you know its really good. one star because i was fired for staring at the witch/dropping plates/too many smoke breaks. That witch is sort of a hard ass.
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Joe Moore is a comedian and writer from Philadelphia. He is a writing instructor at the Philly Improv Theater and has appeared performing sketch comedy at festivals across the country with Dog Mountain. Find out how much he can bench press at thejoemoore.com.
